My friend and former business partner, passed away last week. For 22 yrs. I've felt an energetic, intuitive, spiritual connection with her ~ I loved her completely, even during a rough time and time of estrangement ~ which defined the last three years. But, in the last month, though she and I did not speak directly, we communicated: I wrote a card. She called and left a message. I called and left a message. She showed up in my dreamspace. I called and left a message. And then... her daughter called and said her mother, my friend, had died ~ Sarah's soul had taken flight ~ I was then left to my tears.
I have tears and memories, lots of both, and a few regrets. Feeling sad that I didn't get a chance to see her one last time, I remembered that we had been together in a dream. I was stunned when I realized that she had died the same morning I'd had the dream. I am just now beginning to have a sense for the extravagant gifts she gave me throughout our relationship, but particularly at the end of her life ~ love, forgiveness, kindness, presence, connection ~ so extravagant and so amazing, my inclination is to say, "that's too much ~ you didn't have to ~ I don't deserve it." A gentle voice asked about gratitude... things became a little clearer... I am so incredibly grateful for Sarah's gifts to me and I understand now that in accepting/ receiving those gifts with the grace and spirit in which they were given, I can let go of regrets, allowing that loving energy to flow back and forth between us, unhindered ~ it honors our relationship, past, present, and future ~ truly, all of it. So, with open hands and heart, Thank you, Sarah. Thank you!
On my answering machine, I hear her voice saying, "Between you and me, honey, there will never be 'too little, too late.' ...Love to you!" There are relationships that transcend time and space ~ I believe that ours is one of them and that Sarah's energetic presence and wisdom will always be with me... and that, is an amazing and wondrous gift. ~ With Love and Peace